Blah Blah,,

Matt mentioned in passing this summer was his first one he hasn't been at any beach since... (well, welcome to England). As for me, past a few months have been a block of timespan where I felt so stagnated that I did not feel like having a monthly goal or planning anything in my life. Time just waiting to be passed.. don't know why..

Oliver emailed me for the first time in 4 years voluntarily. A big surprise. Something must have triggered him enough to write to me at 3 o'clock in the morning. It was not much of a personal letter though. He still has a huge barrier up around him. Bless him.. It was about nottingham and me. about 3-4 sentences.. What the heck.. What is the relationship between me and nottingham?? Remains to be developed I would prefer to say.. anyway I used to be amazed by him, the English man who was able to speak 4 languages at conversational level and all the rest.

I wonder what I used to feel excited about in my life.. niteout? wine and dine? walking? a good company? flirting? why do I feel it seems pointless to pursue the things that will only last a second and feel hungry again? Well, I think I ought to have an inspiration at this point. maybe I will start something from September.

I decided to delve into web design to diversify my career well,, it was actually quite a few years ago I thought of doing it if you know what I mean. I wanted to do something creative at the same time professional.

Speaking of a career, it was purely by chance that I went into this Quality business /ISO after Uni only thinking the fact this job sounded like an international one. Since then, I have been stuck in this field and been learning from calibrating micrometer (thanks to mark, our former principal Engineer), understanding the difference between defective and defects, PPM, SPC, CMM to the stage where I worry about uncertainty of measurement and AQL level. Having studied literature sometimes I wonder what on earth I am doing in this manufacturing industry and I wish I studied mechanical engineering instead then my words would have carried more weight at work. Never mind, it is still pretty cool to be able to decide what to do in my own department.

Since I can remember myself, I have always been competitive. Guess deep down I always knew that I was not the lucky one like my sister. so I had to believe I could achieve things through my afforts if not by intelligence. It paid off most of the time and I am happy with it. But being glued to TV and watching olympic games every night, God, what an achievement it is! I could empathise with their emotions when contestents talk how hard their training has been and what sacrifices they had to make to come to the place where they stand. It was an absolutely tremendous effort that they put into it. If I lived my day everyday like they did, I might have been the place where I only dreamt of. pianist? intepreter? teacher? even olympic medalist.

I went straight to the gym that evening, 15mins into my running, I had to slow down God, I am getting on a bit now! forget those young stars doing triple jumps or beam, let's stay on the treadmill 5mins longer!